5 posts tagged “women”
Editor Content
Men suck at listening because we always try to skip ahead and solve your problem, like filling in the end of a stutterer's sentence. Why? Because we assume that's what you want. Sympathy is alien to us; no guy ever brings up a problem out loud (sign of weakness) unless he is asking for answers. So when you say, "This girl at work is such a bitch to me every day…" to us it has the urgency of "Honey, my car is broken down on I-35 and it's raining and this cell phone's about to die." So we jump up and throw the toolbox in the car; it's hard for us to absorb that all you want is, "You must feel so wet and frustrated! How's your hair holding out?"
Maybe we didn't learn everything there was to learn about
women, and maybe I actually learned some of these gems from my long-suffering
best friend and wife, Leslie. But we Maxim editors found that, for a bunch of
lusty louts drooling over lingerie shoots, our readers sure did eagerly lap up
all the relationship advice we could dish out. They truly wanted to be better
lovers, better listeners, and better men. So my best advice for you in dealing
with your own "reader" is to be completely straightforward about what you want
and how you feel. Deep down all men want to know your secrets … and if you
encounter any token resistance, just unbutton two more buttons and try again.
***I lost the link, so I apologize. It was on MSNBC.com***
This is so true. I have a sometimes borderline contemptuous relationship with a couple females in my life and I was unaware of the difference in perspective. It is very true however. Going forward, I will do my best not to think of men and women as the same from a thought process perspective.
Women really do feel the cold more than men, but this is because they are better at conserving heat than men. Mark Newton, a scientist at W.L. Gore, the company that makes Gore-Tex, and a researcher at the University of Portsmouth, explains: “Women have a more evenly distributed fat layer and can pull all their blood back to their core organs.”
However, this female heating system means that less blood flows to their hands and feet, and as a result they feel cold. So there is literal truth in the old saying cold hands, warm heart. One theory as to why women have evolved this system, says Newton, is to enable them to survive freezing temperatures. Women carry less fat and muscle mass than men, and so need a more efficient technique of protecting their core body temperature.
Research also indicates that women's perception of cold varies during their menstrual cycle, says Newton, with the core body temperature often changing by more than 1C. A study in 2001 found that women's core temperature rises in the luteal phase (the post-ovulation phase) of the cycle. The researchers also found that women on the Pill have a slightly elevated core body temperature.
But it's not only hormones that can muck around with our biological thermostats; sleep can also affect how chilly or hot we feel. When we are tired we're more sensitive to changes in temperature, says Newton. Our body temperature falls at night, with women reaching their minimum body temperature quicker than men.
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article5106854.ece
Turn Ons
Its a given that I am a bit of a strange bird, but I have a rather common list of things that turn me on. I'd love to prioritize them, but doing so just may alter my mood...hehehe *wink wink*
As far as what turns me on physically on a woman:
I absolutely LOVE high heels on a woman. Strappy sandals in particular. High heels look sexy on a woman and they tell me that she is comfortable with who she is. She is driven, sexy, fun, intelligent, and leads an exciting life. That is what a sexy pair of heels says to me. I LOVE women in high heels!!!
I am also turned on by ankle bracelets and belly chains. As a leg man, I appreciate a nice pair of sexy legs, and an ankle bracelet accentuates that. It draws attention to the lower part of the leg where I can notice her shoes and sexy calves. :-) Belly chains turn me on, but they only work on certain types of women. I think that those women know who they are. Actually, thinking about that...that may have been mean and most likely wrong. Too many beautiful women have poor self-image and are likely to think that they aren't sexy. That they can't wear things like belly chains. Ladies: if you dress properly for your body type, you can be sexy no matter what your shape. You will feel better about yourself, and that comes across to any guy who isn't JUST trying to get in your pants.
I love a woman who can put an outfit together. I love shopping, and if I happen to have the same taste in clothes as far as style goes, that is a huge bonus! A woman who can accessorize an outfit without being too over the top is also a bonus!
I love big eyes on a woman. A persons eyes will always tell you the truth. Looking into someone's eyes tells you a story, and if I am into someone, I want to know that story.
As far as general turn ons:
I love a smart woman. One who is driven and has an idea of what she wants to do with her life. I like someone who is responsible on one hand, yet can be rambunctious on the other. In other words, I want someone who can straddle the line between adulthood, and youthful ambition at the same time. I like a woman who will speak her mind and shows interest in things aside from The Hills. (If you like the Hills, that is a major turnoff)
Things that turn me on physically:
I like it when a woman is kissing my ear. A slow, sensual kiss to my ear can tell me all kinds of things: I can tell by her breathing what she is feeling, sometimes even thinking. I find it very intimate.
I also like it when a woman takes the initiative on occasion. Its nice to know that she can be as rowdy as I on occasion. I like a woman who isn't afraid to let go and give into her feelings on occasion no matter what they may be.
I don't think I want to go into too much detail on this department! lol
I came across this on my very first blog (originally posted 2006!) and found it interesting. I find it interesting due to the writing style, but the content is what strikes me the most. Some things have changed, and some things have not. The gist is that I still suck at relationships however. lol Enjoy:
I often wonder how someone who is rather intelligent can suck so fantastically at relationships. The strange thing is that once I am in one, I am fine. More than fine even. It is the initial stages that get me.
I suppose my problem is twofold. I have a hard time in the "courtship phase." My analytical mind fails to pick up on rather obvious signals (or so I am told). This is only half of the case however. Sometimes, I do pick up on signals, but because of my unfamiliarity, I may feel that I misconstrued them, or I might feel embarrassed, or any other number of different things. I am not totally obtuse. Just partially. Translation: my chick radar sucks.
I don't go out anywhere (seriously -if it isn't work or school, I am at home) so this limits my dating pool. It is weird that I am even having this conversation. I have a very different personality and it usually takes someone some time to get to know me before they determine if they will like me or not. I gave up on the possibility of dating about 6 years ago, and that definitely affects my behavior with the opposite sex.
In summary so far: I don't meet people, and when I do, I have no idea if they like me.
Now let's assume that the stars have aligned and I find someone who likes me. Actually likes me, not just for sex. I have had some bad luck with ladies in that regard. I don't know when it became part of popular culture to want to have sex with your friends mancandy (C&C, N&L, J&C...) but I am not playing that game anymore...
Anyways, how is a man supposed to tell if a girl is into them if they can't read the signals? One minute they are like YAY and the next minute you are an afterthought? The worst part about this? It isn't a staging process, but rather a cycle! It isn't an "OMG, I am so into him!" and "OMG, Who is he again?" transition, it is much more of a "Wow, you are so awesome" to an "oh, yeah, how are you?" cycle.
The powerlessness of relationships can be truly scary. I hope to someday meet someone who will take some time to understand me. Everyone is unique. The things we think, things we say, things we do...they are all based on an amalgam of things from our upbringing. This manifests itself in our interactions with others each day. I hope to meet someone who will learn to understand me. That sometimes my actions or words differ from my intentions. I hope that she is out there.
Anyone who spends any amount of time with a group of women will acknowledge this as the truth. I certainly experienced it when I worked at Kwik Trip with 26 women. I was the only guy. I still have the scars...
Women in groups can't get along. If you take a group of 3-4 women and have them spend any amount of time together, there will always be an odd (wo)man out. Why? I have my own opinion, and it was validated. By a woman. In the legal profession. Excerpt:
No one really talks about it, but one of the main issues preventing women from getting along with other women is jealousy. In the professional world, it breaks down to one of two things: jealousy over how good you are at what you do or jealousy over how good you look doing what you do. These related but distinct problems each deserve their own post, so I’ll start with Green Monster #1: when you’re prettier than the average woman. Many of you reading this are probably already feeling an aversion to the topic—none of us likes to admit that other people are better looking than we are or, even worse, that we resent them for it. In fact, many of us don’t admit it, not even to ourselves. Instead, we channel the jealousy into resentment and let it lurk inside of us until the object of it does something that we can interpret maliciously—and then we hate them for that reason.
A little sanity-Thank God. I knew that women weren't catty monsters:
What I wish I could tell her is that being hated for being attractive isn’t necessarily about what you look like. A lot of it is about what you do with what you look like. The most sought after person may not be the most beautiful one but rather the one who puts herself out there. Yes, I’m talking about flirting. So, while I would never suggest that an attractive woman should slum herself up so her co-workers won’t be jealous of her, I would suggest that there are things that can be done to avoid being eaten by other women by Green Monster #1, especially since, as I detail below, while in my experience women might be jealous of any attractive woman, they only actively hate those who inappropriately use their sexual appeal to get ahead.
In summary, she states that women don't necessarily hate women because of how attractive they are (this has been my experience as well), but because of how they use that to their advantage (also my experience). If you are an attractive woman, use that to your advantage, but not by using your sexuality. Take that knowledge and turn it into self-confidence. That will logically spiral into the same benefits, without the resentment from your peers.
http://ms-jd.org/when-other-women-hate-you-because-you039re-beautiful
